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Home :: Archive :: 2000 :: January ::
Re: Goofy Answers
The Shakespeare Conference: SHK 11.0079  Friday, 14 January 2000.

[1]     From:   Stephanie Cowell <
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        Date:   Thursday, 13 Jan 2000 12:39:59 -0500
        Subj:   SHK 11.0076 Re: Goofy Test Answers

[2]     From:   Lisa Schnell <
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        Date:   Thursday, 13 Jan 2000 12:47:46 -0500 (EST)
        Subj:   Goofy Test Answers

[3]     From:   Nancy Charlton <
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        Date:   Thursday, 13 Jan 2000 19:12:29 -0500
        Subj:   Re: SHK 11.0076 Re: Goofy Test Answers


[1]-----------------------------------------------------------------
From:           Stephanie Cowell <
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Date:           Thursday, 13 Jan 2000 12:39:59 -0500
Subject: Re: Goofy Test Answers
Comment:        SHK 11.0076 Re: Goofy Test Answers

Oh gosh, my stomach aches and I have tears in my eyes laughing over Joe
Conlon's student's essay!

This is not a goofy answer, but a rather naive Shakespeare story about
myself to share! At the age of about 13 when I was a shy and
introspective girl, I found myself in New York's then seedy Times Square
and wandered into a porno book store to ask if they carried copies of
"Hamlet" because I needed one for school. I didn't know anything about
porno stores and it seemed to me that EVERYONE with a "Books" sign in
the window would stock Shakespeare...I recall the astonished silence
from the man behind the counter and my own sudden dim awareness that
great literature was not to be found there. I meekly retreated from
store and street,,,

[2]-------------------------------------------------------------
From:           Lisa Schnell <
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Date:           Thursday, 13 Jan 2000 12:47:46 -0500 (EST)
Subject:        Goofy Test Answers

Okay, I can't resist.  The following two "typos" are culled from essays
this past semester I'm tempted to gloss them, but I think they speak
best for themselves:

"The other three marriages [in Measure for Measure] are very disturbing,
the Duke and Isabella, Angelo and Mariana, and Lucio and a prostate that
he had impregnated at one point."

"Oberon is fed up with Titania's independent behavior.  He calls her a
"rash wonton" and challenges her by saying "Am I not thy Lord?""  (try
ordering that next time you call for takeout-I'm sorry, I couldn't help
it)

Lisa Schnell
University of Vermont

[3]-------------------------------------------------------------
From:           Nancy Charlton <
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 >
Date:           Thursday, 13 Jan 2000 19:12:29 -0500
Subject: 11.0076 Re: Goofy Test Answers
Comment:        Re: SHK 11.0076 Re: Goofy Test Answers

>My wife attended an evening class at university as a mature student. The
>instructor brought in one of the deans as a guest lecturer and
>introduced him as Dean ____ using only his last name.
>
>After the lecture she heard students, not 1st year ones either, saying,
>'Dean said this,' and, 'Dean said that', blissfully oblivious of the
>fact that his first name was not Dean.

>John Ramsay

This reminds me of what happened when I went to get my hair cut a few
weeks ago.  Previously I had tried several shops and could not get
anyone to do the cut the way I wanted.

The owner gave me into the care of a Generation-X girl who commanded my
immediate respect by ordering me not to cross my legs, as it throws the
balance off and the cut comes out wrong.  Then,

Kim: "How would you like your hair cut?"
Nancy: Short.  I'd like it to be like Dame Judi Dench.
Kim: Who?
Nancy: You guys are Brits, I thought you'd know Dame Judi Dench.  The
British actress.  She was in--
Kim: I'm not a Brit, Michelle [the owner] is.  Michelle!  She wants her
hair like Dame Judy--what's her name?
Nancy: Dame Judi Dench."  (Michelle nods in approval.)
Michelle to Kim: A pixie.  Like this.
Kim: Oh.  Why didn't you say so?  Who is this Judy woman?  Is that
really her name, Dame Judy?

Kim gave Nancy the best haircut she's had in years!  Nancy was beginning
to feel like the Player Queen of her haircut-sake!

Nancy Charlton
Gulph Mills PA  USA
 

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